How to Write Your Own Wedding Vows.

A Step-by-Step Guide of How To Create and Write Your Own Wedding Vows with Examples!

Writing your own wedding vows can feel daunting, but it is one of the most personal, meaningful parts of your ceremony. It’s a chance to express your promises, your love, and your story in your own words.

 

As a wedding celebrant, I’ve seen first hand how powerful personal vows can be, and I’m here to help you write vows that feel authentic and memorable.

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Why write your own vows?

• They allow you to speak directly to your partner in your own voice.

• They make your ceremony unique.

• They become a keepsake you can return to throughout your marriage.

• They help you reflect on your relationship and what marriage means to you.

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Step 1: Reflect on your relationship

Before writing, spend some time thinking about:

• How you met and how your relationship grew.

• What you love most about your partner.

• How they make you feel.

• The challenges you’ve overcome together.

• What you’re most excited about for your future.

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Step 2: Decide on the tone and style

Discuss with your partner:

• Will your vows be serious, light-hearted, or a mix of both?

•  Will you write them together or separately?

• How long should they be? (Tip: Aim for 1–2 minutes.)

• Are you going to take turns and who goes first, or are you going to write them together and say a line each?

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Step 3: Structure your vows

Here’s a simple structure you can follow:

Opening: Share what you love about your partner.

Story or memory: A moment that defines your relationship.

Promises: The commitments you want to make.

Closing: A heartfelt line or future wish.

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Step 4: Start writing (imperfectly)

Don’t worry about getting it perfect on the first try. Write down your thoughts, stories, and feelings, then shape them into a flow. Read them aloud to hear how they sound.

I’ve seen a lot of couples forget to write to the words ‘I love you’ in their vows.  So a little tip is to either start writing your vows with the opening line, ‘I love you’, or close your vows with the line, ‘I love you’.

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Step 5: Practice and prepare

• Read your vows aloud a few times to get comfortable.

• Print them or write them on a vow card for your ceremony.

• Remember, it’s okay to be emotional when reading them.

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Examples of personal wedding vows

Example 1 (Romantic and heartfelt)

“From the moment you smiled at me in that tiny café, I knew my life had changed. You are my calm, my laughter, and my home. Today, I promise to stand beside you in every season, to support your dreams as if they were my own, and to love you fiercely for the rest of our days.”

Example 2 (Light-hearted and warm)

“I promise to love you even when you leave your socks on the floor, and to always share the last piece of chocolate with you. I promise to support you in your dreams and to always laugh with you, especially when we have no idea what we’re doing.”

Other Examples

Gabriel and Marissa. 

Gabriel, you came into my life at exactly the right time: When I wasn’t ready, and yet, when I needed your love the most. In the past two years, we’ve experienced great triumphs and literal disasters together. These trials have pushed the boundaries of what we thought we could endure, and in the end, I feel more strongly connected with you in a resolve to get up and try again. I love you dearly for all that you are. I am amazed by your inquisitive mind and tickled by your sense of humor. I may not want to admit it, but I even love your awful puns.

You have stuck by me through the best and worst and loved all that I am. You help me to be the finest version of me that I can.

As your wife, I promise to love you with the same determination and confidence you’ve given me. I vow to support you through more ups and downs. I pledge to commit myself to our family and the good I know will grow from it. I promise this all to you until I am no more.”—Marissa

Marissa, I love you with all my heart. I have been thankful for these past two years that you were not the best driver on that fateful day. Stopping in the middle of a busy 90/04 to see if everyone was okay, there I met the woman who is standing before me today. When we started dating, I gained a family, a woman who loves me, and an adorable whippet—both of whom I adore with all my heart. We have survived trials and tribulations, from Hurricane Irma to differing political views, we have pulled through.

We are survivors and with our perseverance and dedication, there is nothing we can’t accomplish or overcome.

I promise to take care of you even when you get food poisoning on New Year’s Eve. I promise I will unclog the shower even though only one of us has long hair. Marissa, I love you unconditionally and always will.” —Gabriel

Devin Lee and Jeremy 

Devin Lee, it is impossible for me to put into words the passionate and infinite embrace you have on my heart. You make me a full person. Committing the rest of my life to you is actually pretty easy because without you I am nothing. As we begin our life together in front of those whom we are closest to, I make the following vows: I vow to wake up every morning and thank God that he gave me you, my perfect woman, and I vow to be your steady rock in turbulent times. I vow to put your needs before my own.

I vow to sell my tacky furniture. I vow to watch reruns of Gilmore Girls and Friends.

I vow to be the man that you inspire me to be and the man that you deserve. Finally, I vow to spend every day I have left on this Earth showering you with a zealous love and a faithful commitment. A love that many waters cannot quench, a love that floods cannot drown.” —Jeremy

Jeremy, I can’t say we fell in love at first sight or that I wasn’t hesitant to go on a date with a co-worker, but I can say with 100 percent certainty that today, I am marrying my soul mate. A few years back I heard a sermon about love. I learned that, even though I felt ready for the responsibilities of a lasting love, I had to wait. I had to wait for the person God created for me to be ready as well. During our first few months, I learned about your adventures and how you came back home because you were ready—from that moment on I knew my wait was over.

Over the last two years you’ve shown me what a great love looks like and every morning I wake up and fall more in love with you.

I vow to put us first and make sure we are constantly working to grow together. I vow to love you and honor our commitment when we are near and far from each other. I vow to remember soup is a side—not a meal. I vow to stand by you in life’s wonderful moments and when life is difficult. Also, for making me wait so long—I vow to make you wait on me getting ready for the rest of your life. Jeremy, you’re the person I waited for and you were worth the wait. Today I become your wife, your other half, and I can’t wait for all the blessings we will wait for together.” —Devin Lee

Kristen and Dennis

Kristen, as the cliché says, you showed up when I was least expecting you. I intend to love you, hold you, and grow very, very old with you. These are my promises: I promise to always be there when you have troubles, and to know that sometimes simply letting you talk about your problems is enough. I promise to be the most dependable person in your life. I promise you that laughter will always be commonplace in our house. I promise to do my best to age gracefully in body and soul and not to become a cranky old man.

I promise, from this day forward, to live my life as a member of a band and not a solo artist.

I promise to lead and follow accordingly and to keep our relationship in good balance. To quote a favorite writer, ‘You fill up all those empty spaces.’ For that I am grateful, and every day you will see that appreciation.” —Dennis

Dennis, I am truly blessed to be a part of your life, which as of today becomes our life together. I promise to encourage your dreams because that is what makes you so unique. I promise to celebrate the joy of every day with you. I promise to stand by your side through life’s most joyous moments and challenging ones. I promise to be kind, patient, and forgiving. I promise to always honor your passion for hockey.

I promise to always remember that laughter is life’s sweetest creation, and I will never stop laughing with you.

But most of all, I promise to be your true companion always, for one lifetime with you could never be enough.” —Kristen

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Final Tips

• Keep it authentic to your relationship.

• Speak from the heart, not for perfection.

• It’s okay to cry or laugh – that’s what makes it real.

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Need Help Crafting Your Vows?

If you need guidance in shaping your vows or creating a personalised ceremony that feels true to you, I’d love to help.

Get in touch here to book a free consultation.

Your ceremony should be a reflection of your love story, and together, we can create something truly special for your wedding day.